CNA’s and respect

In the LTC setting it seems that one of the most important skills we all should have is in severe lacking: RESPECT. Respect towards our peers, leaders, people who work in other departments and residents. Without a healthy amount of respect towards others we close doors upon ourselves.

Respect towards peers- other aides- is SO important if one wants to able to work effectively and in a team like manner. It isn’t hard to respect others, it just seems so. First, we have to let go of all our old assumptions about people. Start with a fresh perspective and it is easy.

People generally:
Like to be helpful
Like to be liked
Like assistance
Like “fitting” in with others
Think better of others who use manners

People generally:
Don’t like being yelled at
Don’t like being treated as though they don’t know anything
Don’t like to be gossiped about
Don’t like being ignored
And most of all, people usually don’t respond well to others who demand things rather than ask.

Using manners in all your communications is the very first thing we can all do to improve our ability to gain respect from others. Sharing our experience in a helpful and mentoring way is another step.

Saying “Thank You” and “please” and “excuse me” are things we all learned in kindergarten or early on in life. For some reason these basic skills get lost as we grow up and become members of the workforce. I respond much better to someone who says to me- “Could you please get the door for me” vs. someone who says- after the fact- ‘Why did you slam the door in my face!?” (Usually said behind my back in some gossip session and usually I had no idea the person was right behind me and needed help!) Two good things can happen with this example: The other aide feels good because he/she got a helping hand with the door and I feel good because I was able to help. So simple yet so often not done.

Since many of us have years of valuable experience as CNA’s, we have much to share with the new CNA’s fresh out of class. Many experienced aides think it is not their responsibility to mentor new aides; they feel new aides should know everything they need to know. This might be true as far as basic skills with bed making and vital sign measuring, but NOT with the other subtle skills of getting along in a fast paced environment. Skills with speed and organization need to be talked about. The way in which we choose to teach these skills can really have an impact on our profession.

If experienced aides choose to mentor the new aides with an attitude of negativity and “Just one more thing to do”- we will fail. One has to have a positive attitude and one has to respect the position of the new CNA. Remembering what it was like when we were brand new HELPS.

Respect with leaders is a harder issue. Many nurses think that because they have a degree they automatically deserve respect. This is true only so far as the fact they got their education and degree- everyone should respect others for this. But to respect someone ONLY because of their educational status is not always possible. I firmly believe that respect MUST be earned. Nurses who treat CNA’s with respect, who use manners and who seek input from the CNA’s will manage things far better than those who “demand” respect simply due to their title. I am not advocating disrespect for nurses, but don’t give it automatically. You treat them well- with manners and dignity and hopefully they will respond the same towards you. Also, when respect is handed out without any perimeters staff tend to become like the leader. This can be both negative and positive. A leader who yells and is just miserable tends to have staff with the same attributes working for them.

So, using your manners and being polite DO go along way with respect. Sharing your knowledge and skills in a positive way also help move our profession in a good path. Not handing over respect just because someone demands it makes you a better person because you have standards for respect. What about respecting the residents?

Residents should always have our respect-unlike nurses and others- simply because they have lived long lives and because they are the paying customers within the LTC setting. They are our bosses. Without them we would not be getting a paycheck.
Residents of the Greatest Generation often fought in the world wars and lived through the Great Depression. Respect for this is expected and we should all give it! And we should be grateful. Members of this generation gave much in order that we can be as we are- they sacrificed and suffered for freedom and for American way of life. Never underestimate their sense of duty to their country.

Again, as with peers and leaders, using our manners and being sincere with our efforts will go a long way towards having good relationships with residents. This generation really expects manners and they tend to have different ideas about work ethics and how to raise children. Politics and religion are often taboo subjects with the elderly. Using correct names and titles are expected and show respect. Nicknames, although cute and becoming, should always be “Ok” with the resident and they must respond well to them.

CNA’s need to respect the values of the older generations. Currently, for example, the US is involved with military operations in Iraq. Many of the current generation (younger) feel no need to get involved with this war and are very much against it. Members of the older generation, if they know about the war, probably feel quite differently about it. They most likely feel it is the duty of every American to join the military services and serve the country. These current events can lead to hard feelings between generations. No matter how strongly one opposes war or sees a need for it, always respect how the Greatest Generation feels. Remember, they have sacrificed much more than we have.