This is hard. I agree that it us tough to have a roomate whose husband does these things. Can’t the nurese talk to him and let him know how unappropiate this is? Or the DON.

Reading the answer gave me a bad taste though, too:
“We suggest that you try again to resolve the matter and, if you can’t, we suggest that you contact the long-term care ombudsman and file a grievance or, as a last resort, move your mother to another facility that “keeps a lid” on patients’ rights of this nature.”

That term, keeps a lid, shows this person doesn’t respect these rights too much. But I have to say, is it the residents right or her husbands rights here??

We used to have a lady who was totally bedbound. She was a total care and huge. Demented. Non verbal..her husband would come by every other Sunday and take her home for hte day. His sons would lift her into a wheelchair and then into the truck. When she was retutned to us it was pretty obvious what had gone on at home- sexual relations. We always felt this was a form of abuse because she could not tell anyone if she wanted this. No one ever spoke to her husband though, and this contiued for months until she passed away. The man was old and retarded- he barely spoke, couldn’t drive, had a history and a criminal record. I wonder how it would go over now a days.

Single/Private rooms would take care of this issue.

And that’s a bog part of culture change. Let’s hope we can get there though. I have my doubts.